Signed, Sealed, Delivered with Amy Weinland Daughters

Kristin Nilsen 0:01

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Speaker 1 0:45

And I think that the assumption we have is that when we tell somebody all those things in a letter that it's going to mean so much to them. But you know, really the person who was most changed by all the letter writing was me. A song that was saying, Come on get this will make you

Michelle Newman 1:14

welcome to the pop culture Preservation Society. The podcast for people born in the big wheel generation who knew a sack lunch and a tin foil wrap soda can meant field trip.

Kristin Nilsen 1:26

We believe our Gen X childhoods gave us unforgettable songs, stories, characters and images. And if we don't talk about them, they'll disappear like Marshall will and Holly on a routine expedition.

Carolyn Cochrane 1:36

And today, we'll keep on saving that ancient art of letter writing. I'm Carolyn.

Kristin Nilsen 1:43

I'm Kristen.

Michelle Newman 1:43

And I'm Michelle. And we are your pop culture preservationists.

Kristin Nilsen 1:50

So as we told you last week, the response that we got to this topic of letter writing was overwhelming and unexpected. It blew us away. I really thought this topic would fly under the radar. It did not it smacked us in the face with the responses that we got from people, we had no idea how strongly people felt about the letters they sent and received over their lifetime. And it made us sad that this isn't really a thing anymore. And so today, we're back for more with a woman who felt just as strongly about letters as you all do. And she decided to do something about it. And she wrote a letter, a handwritten letter to each and every one of her 580 Facebook friends.

Michelle Newman 2:34

That sounds tiring. That's exhausting.

Carolyn Cochrane 2:37

Oh, I want I'm already wanting to crawl under this table and pull it like blanket over my head.

Kristin Nilsen 2:41

But she was on fire. This was something that was important to her just like it's important to the people out there. She was on a mission to accomplish something. And so she took all of that information. She took this experience. And she wrapped it up into a book called Dear Dana, how I went crazy and wrote to all of my 580 Facebook friends. Did I get that right?

Carolyn Cochrane 3:03

Really long title is but you should know what the books about by like, yeah.

Kristin Nilsen 3:07

You can tell you know, instantly.

Michelle Newman 3:10

And I also love how Amy owns it how I went crazy. Yeah. And but as you're going to hear in a such a meaningful and impactful way. Yes.

Carolyn Cochrane 3:20

Yeah. So just like Amy has this newfound fondness for handwriting letters. I too have always had a soft spot in my heart for handwritten notes and letters. And because of that, I actually created my own line of note cards, I wanted to create a line of cards that encouraged people to put pen to paper, and share memories and moments with friends. And so these cards are very simple. Dotted Lines provides you with basically a prompt to help you know what to say, for instance, did I ever thank you for letting me borrow dot dot dot, the cards are simply four and a half by five. And you can write four sentences and send it off. And imagine how excited the recipient will be to learn that you were so grateful when they let you borrow that tampon in class.

Michelle Newman 4:12

And Carolyn, there's so many different prompts listeners that Carolyn came up with. And I love the one that says every time I hear, you know, like blank, I think of you or it's written something like that. And that one is so fun, because that could be a song, right ADC could be the sound of ice crunching. I have a good friend in high school that every time I hear someone or I chew ice, I think of my friend Susan because we would go out to lunch every day like sophomore junior senior year, and we would crunch ice and her dad was an orthodontist. And she would always say we're not supposed to be crunching ice and we loved this ice at this Deli. And so every time I crunch ice or I hear the sound of crunching ice, so that's a great one to send. Because it's just a random fun thing.

Kristin Nilsen 4:56

I think I sent that one to a friend with hungry like the Wolf, every time I hear hungry like the wolf, it makes me think of you. And I think the way you said it to Simon Lavon Yes. And he wrote back and said, every time I hear hungry, like, I also think of you

Carolyn Cochrane 5:11

goosebumps, I wonder if his wife, Michelle Lavon, would have thought of that.

Michelle Newman 5:16

Michelle Lavon would not have been happy to hear that, Kristen. But Michelle Newman has evolved. And very, I can be happy for you.

Kristin Nilsen 5:24

I think it's really important to note that when we say letter writing, we're not talking about writing pages and pages and pages, like we would have done in 1983. These little cards that Carolyn has developed are just that they're just four by five. And what that means is that you can write a few sentences to somebody, and that alone is an act of love.

Carolyn Cochrane 5:43

Exactly, exactly. And it's simple. And like you just said, Michelle, I mean, it helps rekindle maybe a memory that you haven't thought of in forever, you and the recipient. It's honestly you guys, it's such a big bang for your buck. Just write letters and rekindle these memories and these relationships. And that's why I did that. And I'm so excited that Amy shared with us her story of reconnecting and rekindling memories with old friends and, and some of them are new friends, but there are 580 of those people. I cannot believe that's where

Kristin Nilsen 6:19

a four by five card would really come in. Yeah, you don't have to do the pages and posts. And what and Carolyn is being modest here with what she's not mentioning is that you can find note cards in the PCPs merch shop, and that is because of Carolyn. She has designed cards specifically for PCPs listeners or nostalgia minded people. She's also put jotted lines cards in our merch shop. I'm not sure that there are other podcasts that have note cards in their merch shop. But we do and that's because of Carolyn. Well,

Carolyn Cochrane 6:50

thank you. I just like I've said earlier, it just means a lot to me and feels really personal. And I the feeling I get is so great. I want other people to experience that too. And I think that's really the bottom line of jagged lines is it felt so good for me to do this. I thought other people need to experience this too. So hopefully you'll head over to the merch shop and check

Michelle Newman 7:12

it out. Yeah, that's right on our website at pop preservationists.com. And there's a tab up at the top that says shop and you'll see a lot of really fun Jennex themed cards as well.

Kristin Nilsen 7:22

I mean, a Little House on the Prairie card. Where else are you going to get a Little House on the Prairie card? Thank you, Carol. Welcome.

Michelle Newman 7:30

Carolyn's designed all of the cards you will see not just the dotted lines cards that we have in our shop but also our fun pop culture gen x cards.

Well, gosh, it we always have so much fun chatting with our friend Amy. Don't wait you guys. Yes, we do. She is. She's one of our people she is she's such a delight such a hoot. So let's find out what happened when Amy wrote to her 580 Facebook friends.

Kristin Nilsen 8:15

Joining us today is an old friend of the pop culture Preservation Society. She was the subject of one of our first ever PCPs book clubs and episode 25 When we talked about her first book called you cannot mess this up a true story that never happened, which is a novel about a woman who goes back in time and meets her 10 year old self in 1978. And today, she's back to talk about her new book, Dear Dana, which documents her real life experience in writing actual letters, not DMS in Facebook Messenger, but actual letters to each and every one of her 580 Facebook friends, Amy Wineland daughters, welcome back to the pop culture Preservation Society.

Unknown Speaker 8:57

Thank you so much, friends, it's so good to be back on.

Kristin Nilsen 9:00

It's good to see you.

Michelle Newman 9:02

It's so fun to see you. Oh, great

Carolyn Cochrane 9:04

to see you. Thank you so much for joining us. I am particularly excited about this episode and your project because I also am a big believer in handwritten letters and what they mean. But what's particularly interesting about your project and what resonates with pop culture Preservation Society is the fact that on the podcast, we get to spend a lot of time looking back at our younger selves and those growing up experiences. And I actually consider it a gift to be able to look back at those experiences through my 58 year old eyes. And you were able to have that experience many times throughout this project because many of your letters went to classmates, neighborhood friends, friends from camp. Can you tell us what that was like to reach out to those relationships and talk about stuff that had happened? Way back? Yeah, absolutely.

Speaker 1 9:58

And I think that, you know, when I went into this, I was totally non intentional, you know, when I just kind of went on this journey and then made a decision to start writing these letters. There were so many surprises along the way. But I think the first thing is I thought those letters, the ones to the people who I went to junior high school with their high school or camp, I thought those were going to be the most awkward. Because really, if you if you think about writing a letter to somebody from 40 years ago, you know, what are you even going to say? So I sat down and started writing letters. Well, how does that look? Well, the first thing I would do is go look at someone's profile, and be like, oh, you know, Michelle, what are you doing? You know, when I look and say, Oh, Michelle, you had these kids, you had the success with this podcast, you know, you've had this, you've had that. So first thing, I was like, Oh, my God, this person's real life. And you know, how we look through our Facebook feed. And we're like, you kind of assume a lot of things about a lot of people not because you're a bad person with bad intentions, but because you, you just don't know, you really don't know. So the first thing was, you're looking at an individual person, you're like, wait a second, Kristen, look at what Kristen Did you know, or, you know, Carolyn suffered this loss, you know, so it's a real person, you're like, you're like taking the electronic part of it out. And then when it was somebody from a long time ago, the very next thing you're gonna do is you're going to add value to that person, like, who was this person to me? Like, Michelle, you helped me when my, my grandmother died. And, and Kristen stood next to me at the payphone. When that guy broke up with me, and I was gonna, like, literally, you know, use all my quarters and call his, you know, ex girlfriend and like, go off the off the chain, you know, and Carolyn didn't care that I wore a neck strap with a saxophone on it. She was so you know. And so when you combine those two things, all of a sudden, you went from being awkward, and I don't have anything to say, like, oh, my gosh, how many pages can I put in this letter? Because here's what I ended up doing. Totally not because I'm a great person. And totally just because I said I was gonna write these letters. One, I, like, congratulated Michelle, on her accent to our success. You know, I, I told Carolyn, how sorry, I was about her loss, you know, and, and I congratulated Kristen. And then the next thing I did, I was like, Oh, my God. Thank you, Michelle. Thank you, Kristen. Thank you, Carolyn, for a very specific thing in my life. And it was the most edifying, without meaning to be meaningful thing. Because over and over again, I realized it is never ever too late to tell another human being that they are valued by you. Carol

Kristin Nilsen 12:37

is losing it over there.

Carolyn Cochrane 12:40

I mean, look at my book, it's all the time she Yeah. And Amy, at least from my perspective, and you address this in the book, it's not until looking back through our 58 year old eyes, that you realize just how important that moment was, I mean, it was important to you at the time, but then looking back, you think, oh my gosh, this person that invited me to sit with them at lunch, like how that affected your life going forward? And that just the opportunity to let that person know. Wow, just powerful, powerful,

Speaker 1 13:12

right. And I think that the assumption we have is that when we tell somebody all those things in a letter that it's going to mean so much to them. But you know, really, the person who was most changed by all the letter writing was me. You know, with me, I'm the one who got my life blown out by all of this, because I did you know, I started with this list of like, we all do, everybody's very relatable. Here's your Facebook friend list. It's just random, like, yeah, like, heartwarming, funny, haha, you look at it, I went from looking at this list of like, partial strangers, old friends. And all of a sudden, I was like, this is an absolute treasure trove of real relationships. And it's not that I'm necessarily engaged in all these relationships right now. But it's that these people all fit together to tell my story that like relationally. Like, you can frame this, like, however you believe, or whatever you believe, you know, like, it's the universe or its God, right? And that's everything that's free for everyone to do. But whatever your however, you frame those things, like, Oh, my God, whoever or whatever that is, knocked it out of the park. And I never saw that, until I did this, like, wow, like, look at this story. And that includes that girl at the wedding, like at that girl's wedding that I danced with for 15 minutes, and that we cried in each other's arms in the women's bathroom. No, no little human interaction is without this certain level of value to us in our lives. And that's, and again, I was so non intentional that I didn't mean for any of this, but that's why I wrote a book about it because it was life changing. Right?

Kristin Nilsen 14:39

Well, and what that means this is really profound. It's like, this is this is going to be a little hyperbolic, but it's like these letters are the hand of God, right? It's the it's the connection between all of these little relationships, whether or not they turned into long term relationships is almost beside the point. If you share it on moment together, you are in relationship, and you're not obligated to make that relationship into something bigger, you can just appreciate the moment.

Michelle Newman 15:12

You know, it's kind of it's, it's this is so powerful to me, Amy, and it's making me think how and to pick up. On your point, Kristen, how people say, I don't have any regrets. Because all the regrets and the things that I that you might think I would regret my life made me who I am today, right? I want to now go to my Facebook friends. And I'm not on Facebook that often anymore, but I want to look at all of them. Because there's a reason I accepted all these people as friends through the past, what, 15 years or so. Because they all do have that part of your life, they played a part in your life, whether it was good or bad, or as tiny or monumental. And it's all important. It's all like you just said they're all part of your story. I mean, think of the stories we could all right, just by going back, and using our Facebook friend list is our outline.

Speaker 1 16:00

Wow, that's amazing. That's, that's, you know, I've yeah, I've discussed this story so many times. And both of those comments, right, there were comments, I have not had those. I mean, it's, I'm gonna have to write them down. And when I get off,

Michelle Newman 16:15

I kind of want to do it, though, I kind of want it today, go back and look at my Facebook friend list and come up with sort of an outline, it tells the story of your life. That's what you did, basically, by by writing these letters, you were having to go back to parts of your life that might have seemed really inconsequential, before you did it. And then you realize no, that was a that's a huge deal.

Speaker 1 16:38

Whoever says, you know, through your 58 year old lens, you know, and I think that that includes stuff like a lot of people from high school, I wrote and I said now that I have two kids who've been to high school, this totally changes my perspective, because like you were my friend, my mother must have been on her knees going, Oh my God, thank God. But that's the thing, you look at it through that lens of watching someone you love go through that similar experience. And and you see the value in it. And so it is it is perspective. You know, it absolutely is.

Carolyn Cochrane 17:11

Well, I wanted to share speaking of writing to high school friends, you write so beautifully to so many of them. And one of the letters that I really liked was letter number 49 that you wrote, listeners, you'll have to get the book to see all that happened with letter number 49. Because that's that's a story in itself. But I wanted to read this part of the letter that you wrote, you're telling number 49 That she was your friend and advocate, despite your awkwardness in high school? How big a deal was it? You asked? You helped me and were one of the primary reasons I survived High School. I know you know this, but I really struggled with my relationship with my mom, especially while you and I were close. Before I left home, I didn't realize how messed up it was. But you got me through it to the other side. You showed me firsthand how love and grace work. And honestly, I'm not sure how you thank somebody for that. And this is someone that you hadn't spoken to or been in contact with besides Facebook for a long time. Right? Right, correct me decades. And you got to write that to someone and tell them that I mean, my gosh, I was, as usual kind of tearing up as I read your words. And then to be the recipient of that I can only imagine what that's like so you know, when you wrote those letters, you actually had another quote that I loved that receiving the letter is a wonderful emotional experience. But writing one provides a therapeutic release that is difficult to describe in words. So now I'm going to make you describe but tell me like, What was it like writing letter number 49 and getting to let this person know Oh, my gosh, that's pretty important

Speaker 1 18:49

is and I think what it did for me is again, it just took my gratitude meter and knocked it off the charts. Because on one level I was thankful for that person and I there was such hope in that because I realized you know the relationships I'm in right now we're writing those stories right now me and my you know posse of friends you know of hot, young, attractive, like minded friends that I have so much to be hopeful about because if I was taken care of in high school by number 49 The number blah, blah, blah doesn't even have a number yet she's rockin it somewhere in my life, you know. And then the, I think the experience of getting to write the letters being so thankful for that because so grateful for the the opportunity to say those things to somebody. It goes back to the power of letter writing, we have this incredible power in our hands. We all have it. It costs 66 cents in 15 minutes. And I'll tell you what, if I would have heard myself say this five years ago, I would have laughed and been like you have been on the vodka gimlets. Again, you've got a lot of we have this incredible power because the thing that I realized that one thing is the words, there's one part that's the words. And the other part is the effort. If Kristen sends me a letter, it, let's just say it comes out of nowhere. And it's 2023 2024. I keep forgetting it's 2024. But I know that she had to get paper and an envelope. I know she had to sit down, she had to come up with something to say, and that was going to take some forethought. And she had to write it down. And it didn't matter if it was two sentences, or 64 pages, then she had to get it in the envelope. Then she had to lick it. And then she had to go get the sand and where are those, and then she had to get her but into a car and drive somewhere and drop that thing off. And so when I go out to my mailbox, this is what I didn't realize what this meant. And pull that out. Oh, my gosh, Kristen, I'm mad at her Kristen on a level that I didn't understand. And we have the power to do that. Over and over and over again, in the adrenaline I got from doing that I can't stop doing it. Guys. I every morning. Now I spent 20 minutes, sending two letters to cards to some things to somebody because of it because it makes me the best version of myself. Because there's so many layers to this because, you know, if I right, Michelle, and she writes me back and you believe this, and I believe that and this is your religion. This is my religion. This is your politics. This is my politics. Here's what you think about gender fluidity, la, la, la, la, la, la, on and on and on. Who cares? Like it still matters. But if you reach out to me with nothing will go well on the line. And I reach back out to you in Congress, and then all of a sudden, that connection is not conditional anymore. It's unconditional. And who cares. And all of a sudden, that chasm that we've created between each other all these people on each side of it, it is one firm hand across it to another firm hand. That's what it is. It's so off the chains. So off the chains, and we all have the power to do it.

Kristin Nilsen 21:54

That's the video clip right there. Thank you goodbye.

Michelle Newman 22:03

Back to the learner. As you were saying all that if you've seen me looking down and you look like oh, why isn't Michelle paying attention? It's because I'm scribbling right now a list of people. I don't really do resolutions. I like to just do you know, this is a new year, this is a fresh year, what can you add to your year? What can you you know, you know, exercise, meditate, whatever. But I'm, I'm gonna write letters. And it's not an it's an I'm writing a list right of the things people are just popping into my head now one after the other. And Amy, I think it's, it's because of what Carolyn just read that you wrote in, Dear Dana, it's not for them to get a letter and go, Oh, wow, this is so nice. It's for me, it's like a very altruistic thing, right? It's not to self serve myself and be like, I'm gonna send this person a letter. So they'll feel great. It's really just going to be something that I think is going to be a cathartic thing for me to let these people know what they meant to me, however small and the cause.

Carolyn Cochrane 23:09

Let's talk about that. Amy, what happened? So you wrote these letters? You sent them to people? Some you knew some you hadn't? I mean, all you knew, but some you hadn't spoken to in 30 years. You send them out, then what happens? Oh, people, do you get response? The

Speaker 1 23:25

number was like, 77% I got responses from God. But that's in handwritten letters, Facebook messages, you know, or DM PM b.

Speaker 1 23:41

The very beginning and I loved the beginning of this project, because no one knew about it. I only told the people in my house. So the surprise fact at the beginning was great. But then when I got about letter 250 300, but it was like, Okay, where's my letter and I stopped work were you like, getting friendship request because I was like, This is dumb. You know, I gotta, I gotta limit the number here. But, but over and over again, the most common responses were one the time your ladder was perfect, which is crazy, because I'm pulling people's names out of a box, you know, and that's again, Faith universe, God, whatever you want to call it, you know, just rocking the whole thing. And then two people responded to me over and over again, people told me, you know, what I had done like, that thanked me for things maybe I had done in their life, you know, which was very edifying. But, but even better than that they shared they shared because they felt like they were being treated as an individual. So I got all these people sharing all their personal, intimate details, and that's great, but I was doing this 600 times. So I actually walked away with a level of guilt, because I just could not keep up with the responses. But But I came to realize that my charge was not to try to be everyday friends with 600 people because that's impossible, but to take care of the people in my circle, and if those people were taken care of by the people in there circle, then we regret so but I needed to be deliberate with my six people or 10 people or four people, whoever my circle of close people are. So there was that, but the number one response to this day, you know, when, when Dana and I went on the book tour, after the book came out, we did like 17 stops, I guess. And every time, every single time, no matter where we were, someone would show up with their letter in like, pristine condition. Like they were an absolute Rockstar. And so the most common response from those people, and the people wrote me back and message me was, I will save your letter in a special place for the rest of my life, I will get it out when I feel bad. I when I need a boost, I will I will reread it. You know, it is the best thing, one of the best things anyone has ever given me.

Kristin Nilsen 25:48

Oh, my God. And it's such a small thing. Like you said, it could have been four to six sentences. It's such a small effort we have to make to make that big of an impact. Why wouldn't we do that? To help humanity? Right, right.

Speaker 1 26:01

Now I'm on a mission to get people to write letters. And again, if you would have told me that five years ago, and I would have laughed at you, it is so powerful, and it has such a profound impact as you sandwich on both sides of the equation, you know, people are impacted by this very, very simple act. You know, I told people what every letter, the first paragraph was, like, you know, I kind of talked about Dana and Parker and I was like, you know, I'm writing every single one of my Facebook friends a letter over and over again, people like you chose me, you picked me and I was like, I'm picking on you got that right. About the whole thing, but they felt so. But that's the power, not of my words. I mean, I'm a decent writer, but it's the power of an individual act in this age of, you know, instantaneous communication is so great. And Facebook is so great, I wouldn't be having this conversation with you guys without Facebook, you know, is a jump off point for real relationship, but we do feel isolated, and not like individuals anymore. And that's what a letter can do. And if you think about the physicality of it, you know, you guys are all the way up. And you know, the the cold Midwest, and I'm down here, it's cold today, here, but in sunny Texas. But if I send you a letter, or if Kristen sends me a letter, I'm holding something in my hand that Kristin held in her hand in Minnesota. Yeah, and I am holding her ice envelopes to my heart, you know, and then we have a personality that our handwriting guys, you know, we in the other thing about handwriting, it's so amazing, is that you're not going to rewrite the letter four times, or your four sentences or your one sentence or your set 74 paragraphs, it's going to show that you have to cross stuff out, you're gonna misspell stuff. And look, your handwriting is crap. Those are the best parts of a letter that should not stop you from writing a letter, because you're showing a bit of yourself to somebody and you're showing that you're not perfect. And yay, because none of us are. And we live in a world where I think we kind of expect it because of social media, which is not the All in all horrible thing. But it does put us in a position of comparing ourselves and thinking we should be as perfect as everyone else looks. Because the other thing I found out over and over again, is people's lives are not as good as they look on Facebook. And that sounds so simple. But so true. There's

Kristin Nilsen 28:14

a lot going on under the surface there that that were private people, we're not going to put everything out there on Facebook. So it's not that anybody's doing anything wrong. It's just the nature of of, you know, am I ready to share this. But I think one thing that what you're going to help people with today is I think getting over themselves to do something like this, because especially if you're writing to somebody from high school or junior high, I think we might go back in time to that place where you would assume that, well, they don't want to hear from me, or they think I'm stupid or that what will they think of me? This is awkward? Will they laugh at me? And what you're saying is that 100% of the people were honored and grateful, and certainly didn't go Oh, Amy God, right. And I think our junior high self would be like, Oh, God, who? This girl we're sure Yeah. And that's just not the case.

Speaker 1 29:05

Oh, and they were moved in but But I kept a journal when I wrote the letters. And if I could show you how many times I wrote, oh my god, I just wrote Sherry And Sherry was so popular and I was such a dork. What am I doing over and over again, I doubted myself over and over again. I was like, you have literally lost every bit of sense. You were born with these people were gonna think you're ridiculous and stupid. And like, why would you do that? And you said it Christian 100% of the people I heard back from 100%. were moved touched, changed by the letters. There's absolutely no you don't think about how non intrusive it is. If it shows up in the mailbox. First of all, it's beautiful. You're not even gonna remember what you said. And by the time it gets there, you're never going to know if anybody even read it. You know, so you're not going to expect a response. You're going to kind of hope for one probably, you know But it's non intrusive. They don't have to do anything with it. It's not like a text. It's not like an email. There is no pressure on that person to respond. I love thinking about the 23% of the people who didn't respond to me. I love to sit around and think about the Lumina. I hold no, there's so many people have told me Oh, my God, I'm so sorry. I didn't respond. It was such a numbers game for me at one point that that's fine. But those 23% they were changed. It didn't feel like they had to tell me.

Kristin Nilsen 30:25

Yeah,

Unknown Speaker 30:26

those are the best.

Michelle Newman 30:28

I have a, I have a question that is very, seems very technical, especially since we've been getting so deep here. But I know that some of our listeners have the same question. How did you find these addresses? Like you said, you wrote someone back? We don't have the white pages anymore. People don't post their addresses on Facebook, you're saying someone you haven't talked to since junior high? If anyone else wants to do this, Amy, Tell us? Tell us your tell us your your ways. How do you find the

Speaker 1 30:56

number one way if you don't have the address, and I had about 35% of the dress, the number one way is right to their workplace, if they're a school teacher, if they're so look up, and then it's also another way to be intentional, look at their profile, and figure out what they're really doing. That's part of the process, you know, the for me for the letter writing. So, you know, that's the easiest place totally non intrusive, find out where they work and send it there, you know, then the next thing would be, you know, livestock and Google them and see, if you can find something out, you know, you might be able to find out their workplace, that way, you might be able to find out something about them, you know, third option would be friend of a friend of a friend to someone else have their address, because then you still have the element of surprise, if you operate with all those. But if you get down to the last, you know, the last ditch effort is to Facebook message the person. And this shocked me, because I would say 97% of the people I asked for a physical address gave it to me and I was completely offline, I was like, I don't want you to join my cookie of the Month Club, I'm not gonna sell, you know, I'm not going to sell you anything. There's not a chain letter, I just wrote you a note, I want to send it to you. And at 97% of the people are going to give you the address. And that was always my last effort. But but it and I would recommend if you're going to write several letters, write the letter before you ask, before you go try to find the address. Because if you can't find the address, you're not going to commit to the letter writing and the process that writing the letter is going to give you number one, you're still going to fulfill that even if you don't get to mail it in two. After you've made the effort to write the letter, you will do anything you can to get that person's address because now you're in.

Kristin Nilsen 32:31

Listeners, I think that's our call to action. I think Amy just gave you the instruction handbook. She told you how to find their address. She told you how to format your letter. We're giving it to you. Let's make this happen. And we want to hear from you what exactly the responses are from people. What is your experience of it? Amy Wineland daughters, thank you so much. The book is called Dear Dana. It's available wherever you get your books. If you can buy it from an indie please do that. But I'm pretty sure Amy just wants you to get the book. So thank you, Amy, for joining us today.

Speaker 1 33:04

Thanks, friends. Thanks for having me on. I really appreciate it. Love you guys. Love you, too.

Michelle Newman 33:08

We love talking with you, Amy. Yeah,

Kristin Nilsen 33:10

you know, I'm taking this as a call to action you guys. I'm taking this very seriously. I'm thinking about the card I got from a friend recently I talked about it in last week's episode and how that small Act changed my whole day. It changed my feelings about that friend on that day. And I can do that. Last week, Carolyn and I talked about the letters we got from our dads when we were in college, and how unusual that was to get a letter from your dad. And so it made a lasting impact. My dad right now is in a long term care facility and he's still getting used to it. He's only 45 minutes away. He's not very far away. But it's a struggle to get out there and make contact in a meaningful way. Everybody has a lot on their plate, right? But what if I wrote him a weekly letter? Like my Oh, heroin, just curious is gonna crack. Just like like my grandma did all those years ago, my grandma and her weekly letter and the Grammy dollars that were in the envelope that everybody got $1 And that was my lunch money. What if you were in a long term care facility? Imagine how good it would feel to get letters. Did this interview give you guys any ideas? Oh, without a doubt.

Michelle Newman 34:21

In fact, when we were talking to Amy synapses are firing, right? And I'm thinking, let's do this. Michelle, and yeah, this is my list from when we talked to Amy and I had just oh my god, and I have a list here of about 10 people. So that's all I'm trying to do is just once a week, write one letter, and it's fun and I've used a dotted lines card. Carolyn, good. I've actually used one of our pop culture card. It says something suddenly came up.

Kristin Nilsen 34:48

And how nice to get something newsy. Right. It doesn't have to be profound. It could be today I'm volunteering at the library and then I stopped for lunch at Dino's because I love their French fries. Yes,

Michelle Newman 34:59

that's Sit. That's exactly exactly are you watching? You know, have you watched the bear? Yes. Oh my gosh, I started out slow. But then we really got into it. Just fun stuff. What

Kristin Nilsen 35:09

are you watching? Yeah, what are you reading right now here's what I'm reading, I just finished this. Simple

Carolyn Cochrane 35:13

as that. And I've also revisited who I would like to get in contact with. And I'm doing it from a thank you note kind of a standpoint. So some of the cards that I have, like one is the best advice you ever gave me was dot, dot dot. And I'm going to track down this is gonna take a little sleuthing, but my very first boss, and what I'm going to remind my first boss of was the fact that she wrote me a handwritten note that was on my desk one day, and she said, I love your writing this article was brilliant. We'll find a space for you here. And I kept it in, it's amazing. I'm going to write a card and remind her you might not remember me, but I worked for you in the early 80s. And just thank her because I don't know that those people know that sometimes. A sentence they said to you, a small act, changed the trajectory of your life. I mean, that was the first time I felt acknowledged by a professional writer, that I was a good writer. And so I'm gonna think of some of those people throughout my life, whether it's a teacher, an old boss, maybe even another writer and author. Yeah. How often do other authors get hand written notes that say, this line in your book really moved me or this story moved me? This is all

Kristin Nilsen 36:34

about a moment in which your heart connects with another person's heart. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Amen.

Carolyn Cochrane 36:39

All lujah that's what's that, to me. That's what it's all about. That's why we're on this planet.

Kristin Nilsen 36:45

I think these are all great ideas. And I hope we've inspired all of you to go to the stationery store today. If just one person writes a letter to someone today, we will have done a good deed for the world. Thank you for listening. And we'll see you next time.

Michelle Newman 37:00

I'm gonna go try to find some paper by the pound. Well, today's episode was brought to you by a Nisha, Cindy, Michelle, Hillary, Debbie, Lance, Penny, Kevin Rose, Leanne, and get this you guys film talk. Oh, yeah, matron called film talk. I love that. Thank you to all of you wonderful friends, and all of our supporters on Patreon. And those who generously make one time donations on our website to help keep this podcast coming to you week after week. Gosh,

Carolyn Cochrane 37:36

you guys, I just want to take a moment. And have us really think about all those names you just said. And write a letter to them. You just might do in your mailbox. Because you never know who might might get a little letter because we have most of those people's addresses. Oh,

Kristin Nilsen 37:52

that's a great idea. Let's do the PCPs Facebook friends. Yeah.

Michelle Newman 37:58

We're adding people adding a name a week to our letter writing. Yes, ask list. Just

Carolyn Cochrane 38:03

think how, just from our first episode of this little adventure, and now we're thinking people every week who, who we've connected with and who find something meaningful and joyful when they listen to our episodes and are thanking us for that. And we are so appreciative. So if you would like to become a patron, you can visit patreon.com and put pop culture Preservation Society in the search bar. You can also find a link on our website at pop preservationists.com Or we've got a handy little link on our Lincoln bio on Instagram. And if you'd like to make a one time donation, you can also do that on our website, as well as a link on Instagram, all the links all the other things. In

Kristin Nilsen 38:50

the meantime, let's raise our glasses for a toast courtesy of the cast of Three's Company to good times to

Carolyn Cochrane 38:56

Happy Days to Little House on the Prairie.

Speaker 1 39:01

You guys are so wise. You are that that's part of it. This is fun. I mean, you guys are so much fun. But there's a depth to each of y'all. I mean, it really is fascinating. The

Kristin Nilsen 39:13

information, opinions and comments expressed on the pop culture Preservation Society podcast belongs solely to Carolyn the crush ologists and hello Newman, and are in no way representative of our employers or affiliates. And though we truly believe we are always right, there's always a first time the PCPs is written produced and recorded in Minneapolis, Minnesota Home of the fictional w j m studios and our beloved Mary Richards Nananana. Keep on truckin and may the Force be with you

Transcribed by https://otter.ai